I was so looking forward to spending time with you but it seems that you dont feel the same haha. I guess its just my fault for picking a wrong best friend right? Ah well. Your so blur i bet you dont even realise anything. Well you dont read this which makes this easier. Lol. Haha i was wrong to have compared you to her. You're nothing like her and i was being disrespectful to her by comparing the two of you. I regret that now. Whatever. Im sorry Ger for disgracing your memory.
You could have been a little excited about my arrival? But actually you couldnt care less and only bothered like what 14 hrs later? Yeah fetch me? What a lie. Seriously. Yeah ive considered maybe that isnt you but you could at least act like it. Not once did u ask me out its always me asking you lol. One way friendship thats how i look at it. Sure u listen to what i have to say but all you do is say "I dont know what to say" half the time. Yeah it was wrong to tell you all those stuff. I know you say you have no secrets and so like theres nth i know about u that the whole world doesnt alrdy know and most of the time they know before i do. Well yeah they are girls and i expect that from you i guess. You're just like that i suppose. Not an excuse. A fatal flaw in my eyes. Maybe i was just a game lol cose u alrdy have 2. You just wanted a third safety net? well i dont have that luxury. I have none. So thanks yeah. For being a "friend". Jeez a best friend? not even a friend more of an acquaintance. The new year has brought with it this blessing to me! And you know what i really dont care anymore though i cant honestly say i really dont care because i still do. Yeah im on the verge of not caring already. Because i realise you arent worth my attention and time. It just took me 1 year to realise. Lol. Shit man.
I must be totally retarded or something lol. there were so many hints yup but its ok. Whatever man seriously. I think im just going to give up already because i honestly think its better not to have u even remotely in my life anymore. Everytime i think about it, it only causes me pain. So why bother right? yeah :). I think its time to appreciate other people more. Ive been too blinded by you. Cancelling appointments just to hang wid u when you dont know. Lol i must be retarded. there are people who actually want to hang with me yet i cancelled with them to hang with you who dont even bother asking me haha. Lol. Ok i must be such a retarded joker. I deserve this pain and misery. So i can deal wid it move on and be happy about everything else around me :D. Yeah thats the plan. Your the last little flaw that needs to be cut. I just dont have the guts to say it yet. the time will come though :).
Maybe im just expecting too much from u? But even when i put it at the bare minimum haha i realised that.. all I am to u is an online buddy right? lol ok. thats going nowhere. whatever.
